NO-vember
I’ve been surprised by how many people are already feeling the pinch of burnout from the year, overwhelm about the upcoming holidays, and dread for the hustle and bustle of a new year. Here it is, barely the start of November and people are ready to throw in the towl.
As Ali Wong says in her Netflix comedy special, “I don’t want to lean in. I want to lie down.”
This time of year can be joyful and also fraught. It’s full of demands on our time, whether family obligations, the push to finish work strong, celebrations, reflections, travel…it feels hard to say no or to set boundaries.
But that might be just what is needed to move gently (or rambunctiously, or however you might like) through the holidays and the close of 2025.
Here are a few ways to make NO work for you:
Start with NO: Make “no” your default response. Anything that gets on your calendar has to earn a “yes”.
Check the trade-offs: If you say yes to something, what will you have to say no to? Is it worth it?
Schedule your non-negotiables first: You know those things that keep you sane or bring you wild delight? Put those on your calendar FIRST…then consider new requests and invitations after. That way you’ll know what you need and want is sure to be honored.
Pause to check in: Overcommitment often happens as an immediate guilt response to a request. Give yourself time to consider what you really want your response to be. Start with, “Thank you for the invitation, let me get back to you!”
Choose connection over attendance: If an event sounds draining, drop in for 10 dedicated minutes with the host or send a handwritten note to share what you love about your friendship. Don’t let attendance be the bar for how you care for others – show it to them in other meaningful ways.
How will you shape your final weeks of 2025?
