A tribute
My aunt has always been a wonderfully unique human. I think I didn’t quite appreciate this until I was an adult – when you’re young, you just think your family and the people around you are “normal” and that’s how everyone else’s world is. But once I moved outside my childhood bubble, I could start to see all her interesting ways and manners and the things that influenced me from early on.
Whenever I start to plan a trip, I think of my aunt. Auntie Joan has always been the person who is MOST excited about travel, more so than anyone else I have ever met. When she first decided on a place and set her dates, she would do a jumpy little happy dance. Kind of like a kid right before going downstairs on Christmas morning. She would read books – fiction and non-fiction alike – to start to learn about the area and the people and the customs. She delighted in discovering things that were new and different to her. She was excited for almost anything that would be off the beaten path, that would offer a unique pocket of insight into the breadth of this world.
Traveling off the beaten path was not the only way my aunt expressed her unique tastes. She rarely cared much for the blockbuster movies, always opting for foreign films or documentaries or small movies I had never heard of. Usually the kind that needed subtitles and often made my 10-year-old-self skeptical, wondering if there were any movie stars involved (spoiler alert: there rarely were). She appreciated artistry and creativity.
Auntie Joan was probably the very first person I ever knew, long before I realized it consciously, who felt totally comfortable in her strong introverted nature. She happily did things by herself, never seemed to have FOMO about missing a party or event with a lot of people, and preferred one-on-one time with her very close friends (of which she had many). People mistake introverts for those who don’t like people or want to be alone…which of course we now know as an almost completely untrue stereotype. She beat the introvert drum – delighting in time to herself, enjoying her own company, sticking to intimate connections over group dynamics – long before introverts made their splash onto the scene.
But I think what lives in me most strongly from my aunt’s presence is her insatiable hunger for life itself. She woke up most mornings between 4-5am, too excited about what the day would bring to stay asleep (even just an average day that had no specific, exciting plan). She would watch the sun come up while she savored her coffee and whatever book she was reading. She was thrilled to try new restaurants, check out new museum installments and theater performances (risking plenty she didn’t like for those few gems that tickled her fancy), hear what her friends and family had been up to and treating their adventures like a spectator who had been right there alongside you. She could find something interesting, beautiful, intriguing, or lovely about almost anything she encountered. She embodied awe and appreciation.
Her light first shone into this world on January 11, 1944, and quietly went out on August 30, 2026, but the residual warmth and reach of it will live within all of us who were ever near it. I love you forever Auntie Joan.
On one of our eating adventures
Our first picture together…me at 6 days old
Inadvertently twinning at Christmastime